Me time…

If I was her I would…  If I was him I wouldn’t… isn’t it always easier to do or see what someone should do when the pressure isn’t on you.  If only we could stand back from ourselves for a better perspective and self awareness.  Well…
It’s 8:30 in the morning, I’m walking down the steps in tennis shoes, no socks, sweat pants, a sweatshirt, and no bra, it’s too early.  And no 8:30am isn’t early, I slept in, and there’s no need to rush to put on restraining contraptions.  “Do your business,” is my morning chant with Douglass, our dog.
You know those moments, like an epiphany, that’s when it happened. I saw something that had been right in front of me…for like…ever.
Step by step, the Holy Spirit, told me my problem is, I’m not consistent. Two things will stress me more than anything…time, and sleep.  Time dictates what can be done, and sleep, like it or not, dictates the energy I have to do it.
Time – consistency, and efficiency.
There is not a lot of consistency in my schedule, in places where there could be.  I would ‘blame,’ my schedule, or that auditions aren’t at the same time, or because my work schedule is different on Wednesdays blah blah blah.  Sounds like excuses to me.  I’ve never had an audition before 10:00am, and there’s a practice called planning, and Wednesdays come every week, so no surprise there.
Two areas in time that need to be disciplined are the time I go to bed and time I wake up.  If I’m not borrowing time from tomorrow, it’ll allow tomorrow to be easier.  When setting goals I’m looking ahead at what possible hurdles could trip me up.  Setting my phone in the bathroom does wonders for getting up, and for going to sleep, bye meaningless strolling down Instagram lane.  
Efficiency – I do some meandering…like what am I doing taking so long to tinkle…oh I’m scrolling down instagram, reading emails, etc.  NOTHING!!!  Or there’s the moments of being on the internet and all of sudden I’m taking a quiz on which power ranger am I…what?  That adds to my life how?  As I get older, I’m reminded I don’t have forever.
My hope is that maybe this post, will help you, see you.
“Teach us to number our days, that we may gain wisdom of heart.” – Psalm 90:12 NIV

Marathon Runners

I have a strong dislike for running…what don’t I like about it exactly?  I’m not sure, and I don’t settle into the rhythm until around 10 minutes.  The first 10 minutes, I’m talking myself into it.  Lol! I don’t like, that I dislike running.

I am not physically incapable of performing the task by far.  I’m healthy, and in good shape. Mentally, I’m just like, “ugh!”  And where did I learn to associate “ugh” with running?

I feel like an athlete that started running with this blog at a steady pace, while running, someone put weights in my hands, I kept running, and then there were hurdles on the track.  The first step is a hard one, but to keep going is equally as hard, if not harder.


Is my mind messing with me…

Is my mind messing with me?

Am I living to dream or dreaming to live?

So much conflict and controversy

Changing like the waves, moving like the wind

Time keeps going, and the earth keeps changing,

but society stays the same

Always asking the same question,